The Enneagram used in private life - individual, couple, family - supports the quality of intimate relationships bringing understanding and light to our inner and outer world. It supports individual well-being by clarifying the relationship with oneself, with the environment and society, with one's own resources and difficulties, with things, projects, creativity, sexuality, one's own body, emotions and thoughts.
I believe that in intimate relationships the Instinctual Variants have much more impact than the Type alone.
The Instinctive Variants mostly offer the language that describes the relational dynamics and specifically help to recognize what we are looking for in a relationship and what we are naturally able to donate, what are the priorities that we believe as non-negotiable, such as the way we manage our time, what our preconceived expectations are, how much we include the partner or family in our intimate world, how much we are capable and available to adapt to the other as much as we ask for its adaptation to us. Knowing this delicate aspect also allows us to learn not to take everything personally.
This application of the Enneagram proposes effective practices to balance the three instincts, all of which are important both as individuals and in intimate relationships and in the family; to mediate differences and similarities in relationships; to learn to appreciate the different instinctive priorities that require attention and offer a climate of nurturing and security to each partner and to the relationship.